by fearless_leader » Sun Jun 26, 2011 1:26 am
I know I'm a little late in the conversation, so hopefully I'm not being redundant, but here's my 2 cents. If she's having trouble getting comfortable with the lifestyle change, maybe change how your authority is directed towards her. Try taking authority over things that she needs help with, or struggles with that are important to her, but for whatever reason she just can't seem to grasp and take care of. If it's something that upsets her a lot, and you start using TTWD to help her feel more supported and cope with it more easily, I think it will help her become more comfortable in accepting her lifestyle choice regardless of what others thoughts are. It shows you are thinking of her needs and what's important to her, not just her wants. Also general encouragement always goes great lengths, for example, if you know she's having a hard time behaving well one day, maybe during the day at a time when she is behaving better, compliment her on that behaviour in a way where it shows you like it and appreciate it. Letting her know that her being obedient is attractive to you, will help her feel better about obeying. If you present the lifestyle choice as something you like during day to day in ways like that, and make sure it's something that helps her, I think it's a simple way to aid in accepting the change in lifestyle, because if you both like it and it's a positive thing for the relationship, that's what should matter, not what other people think.
Re: The tops not posting much... being guilty of that myself (having only posted once even though I joined the board a decent bit ago now)... I must say for me, I think I'd post more, but aside from my lovely wife, I've never really spoken to anyone about this. So I personally have a hard time expressing myself when talking about it since I'm not really sure how to phrase things to other people, if that makes sense even. But I do plan to at least try to post a little more often, 'cause as everyone has said, us tops don't post much!