Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

What punishments have worked for you? Which made you (or your partner) feel frustrated or resentful?

This is the meta forum, focused more on general talk.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby DisciplinedHousewife » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:17 pm

My guts are churning right now with anxiety. I've been trying to distract myself so I won't be sick! I was out running some last minute errands this afternoon and rushing around. Well low and behold I got a speeding ticket!!! Of course it was a woman cop too so I had no chance of getting out of it. Of all the luck! We're leaving in a couple of hours and my husband will be home at 7.


Oh man I am in deep sh*t Arkansas! I practically begged her to let me off but she wouldn't. I just cannot believe this happened. I wasn't even going very fast.


The thing is I have to tell him on the day I get a ticket or he considers this lying on top of the ticket if I don't...an EXTREMELY serious offence. How could I get a ticket on the very day we're leaving!!! This is too cruel. :banghead:


I CANNOT tell him! He will frigging freak! I just cannot start our vacation this way. I'm gonna tell him when we get back. What choice do I have after all. He might even make me stay home!!! Omg this is so bad and I am so mad at myself for not being more careful.


I gotta go get myself together because he'll be home soon and I don't want him to be suspicious. I hate lying but the timing is just too crazy. It will put him in an angry mood and I just cannot spoil it. I know I am going to be SEVERELY dealt with though, when I do tell him. I'm absolutely dreading it. :(


Gotta go. Oh Lana, I am in horrible trouble! No one needs to tell me it's all my fault...I know it. I gotta go dry my eyes and make sure I don't look like I've been crying. I'm so upset I could throw up.


Not sure when you'll hear from me again. I'm not telling him until we get back home. I've made up my mind. You guys probably think it's wrong but I just can't do it right now.

Bye for now, gang. We actually leave this evening...I had it wrong about the times. I wish I could disappear off the planet. See ya.


Disciplined Housewife :(
User avatar
DisciplinedHousewife
Rank 2
Rank 2
 
Posts: 44
Joined: Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:30 am
spam_b: I am not a spammer and just want to explore the site and get some advice. Thanks.
How did you find the board?: I googled "Domestic Discipline forums" and your name came up.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby Huney » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:36 pm

I actually can't stand NOT being punished on vacation LOL. I always feel a bit unsettled when I'm out of town away from my home and my dogs and my normal life LOL, and punishments help me feel more secure.... In a few months we are going camping with my husbands parents for 10 days.... Wonder how punishments will work out for us then LOL.

But anyway, maybe you could try to look at it like a little piece of back home that you get to take on vacation with you.... Like when you were a kid and you took a picture of your parents when you stayed the night at your friends house.... except instead its a spanking on vacation LOL
Huney
Rank 2
Rank 2
 
Posts: 30
Joined: Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:27 pm
spam_b: I am not a spammer... Does that work?
How did you find the board?: Google!!!!

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby lana » Mon Apr 30, 2012 8:21 pm

Oh dear, DH.
It might be wrong but id prolly want to do the same thing. Wait and tell him later I mean. Speeding is a very serious thing for us and it worries my hoh to death and angers him when he finds out Ive been speeding or driven dangerously. Id also hate to ruin the vacation.
However, heres 3 main reasons to confess right away:
1 Keeping it a secret undermines the trust youve built up .
2. He will eventually find out anyway. When you do tell him, he might want to see the ticket and it will have the date on it when it happened and you will get a worse punishment for lying (Such as soap ugh).
3. You wont have to keep worrying and have it hanging over your head. You can take your medicine and clear the air. The worse will be a spanking and some early bedtimes. I doubt very much hed cancel the trip now that the tickets are bought. He might even praise you for being so honest when you didnt have to tell at all, right?

I might be able to put off telling my hoh for a while. But when I do, I usually become worried or guilty about what i did or worried he'll find out, and he senses this and i get spanked till i do confess and then its two crimes--carelessness and lying by omission. (I did this same thing when i put my $320 cell phone thru the wash (2nd time) and waited to try to fix it before telling him.)
Whatever you decide, I am hoping your vacation goes well. Ive only been once and it was a once in a lifetime thing.
lana
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby Sara'sGirl(SG) » Mon Apr 30, 2012 11:41 pm

DisciplinedHousewife wrote:I think you misunderstood me. I really don't mean to judge people at all...that's more my husband's thing and oftentimes I quote him. If anything, I'm the one who feels judged on this site. Have you seen my "Questions/Concerns" thread?!


Yep, read it. I'm just not sure you are getting the point though.

It's kinda one of those, "I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend unto death your right to say it" deals. I'm still not sure if you're a troll. I don't particularly care for the way you say things. You say it's your husbands opinion, even though I've quoted YOU saying "I've read about these wives that.....have it so easy" or "Some wives have it super easy and still complain." I find that annoying. But I'm not gonna ask the mods to come make you stop saying it. When I find you annoying, I'll tell you so myself. And you are expected to have your big girl panties on and can either defend your point, ignore me, or whatever. The mods (and I hope they correct me if I'm wrong) don't much care if we disagree, and they aren't going to tell me to knock it off even if your feelings get hurt. They (and anyone else on this board) WILL step in and SAY SOMETHING TO ME if they think I am being overly harsh, mean, or that I'm out of line. TBH, it wouldn't be beyond them (sneaky wenches) to drop my Top a line, and I'm more than okay with that too.

So, I get your're feeling judged. I sorta wish it wasn't that way. I don't much care if you go or stay. If you go, okay, I hope you can find a place that suits you well. If you stay, also okay, and when I disagree with you, I'm happy to say so. :shake:
Nic

Sing 'til you're breaking glass
or you're breaking down

~Idina Menzel

My blog!
User avatar
Sara'sGirl(SG)
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 1064
Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2007 3:58 pm
spam_b: I don't like spam. It's gross. Meat in a can is wrong.
How did you find the board?: I found my way over from Punishment Board, which is a great site that you should all go see if you haven't already. But I'm too lazy to try to link it here.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Tue May 01, 2012 12:40 am

Sara'sGirl(SG) wrote: The mods (and I hope they correct me if I'm wrong) don't much care if we disagree, and they aren't going to tell me to knock it off even if your feelings get hurt.


"The mods" consist largely of me, and in spite of being multiple, I generally prefer to be considered a singular entity. :many:

And I will reiterate: the board's moderation policy is that unless it's spam, or unless the poster indicates that they are not legally old enough to post on this board in their jurisdiction, people can say what they like. People are free to be trolls (although I'd rather they didn't) and people are free to say if they think someone is a troll. We are all adults here, and I trust everyone to work out their differences in a reasonable fashion. It's worked for the majority of the five years this forum has been active, and since free speech (even if I, or others, don't like it) is one of my values, I'm going to stand by that method of running the board.
User avatar
JigsawAnalogy
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 2875
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:44 am
Location: New York
spam_b: I am not a spammer, I *delete* spammers!
How did you find the board?: Hm. Well, I was poking around in my imagination, and there it was.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby altbob » Tue May 01, 2012 12:41 am

@JA - maybe it's like the royal We? Since you are a royal pain in the....
I mean since you are the Queen of the board.
User avatar
altbob
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 414
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2011 1:51 pm
spam_b: Not to spam, or relegate one's self to the lowest dregs of net life, that is the question.
How did you find the board?: Looking up BDSM, came across DD, then TTWD, and Google lit the way.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Tue May 01, 2012 1:12 am

:prince: <== That's me.

Perhaps it *is* the royal we.

And, actually, I remembered that there are a couple of long-time members who have offered to help with moderating, to the extent that they can delete spammers if I don't catch them first. So I suppose that, technically, there are more moderators than just me.
User avatar
JigsawAnalogy
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 2875
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:44 am
Location: New York
spam_b: I am not a spammer, I *delete* spammers!
How did you find the board?: Hm. Well, I was poking around in my imagination, and there it was.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby lana » Tue May 01, 2012 2:02 am

Dear SG
I always believe someone until i have reason not to. I think its not right to accuse a new person of being fake or a troll when we have not even got to know them yet . I havent felt any judgments coming from her but i do feel SHE is being judged prematurely-- possibly because she has a lighter, breezier, less intellectual style than many here do. So what ? Does everyone have to be the same? Im sure that some odd things about my dd would prolly make me unbelievable too.

I also dont see why DHW should have to develop a thick skin. and put on her grownup pants Its not the way to treat a new person .
So yes, SG, I do think in this case you are being "being overly harsh, mean"and "out of line."
JMO
lana

ps My main question is "Where's all the hostility coming from??"
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Tue May 01, 2012 6:54 am

lana wrote:ps My main question is "Where's all the hostility coming from??"


Perhaps it's coming from a different understanding of what's going on.

I tend to view the internet as the kind of place where, if there is an established online community, people either find a way to fit into the existing community, or they find a different place where they fit in better. I, and many other people that I know, don't tend to respond well when someone comes in and says, "I don't like how things are here, you should do it differently." And the more that gets repeated, the more hostile some members of the existing community are likely to be.

When I didn't like how I was treated on other discipline forums, and I couldn't find one that met my needs, I started this forum. I know that there are some members of this board that didn't like how they were treated here, and they started *their* own forum. That's a great approach, and while I'm sad to lose the connection with people I considered friends, I assume they are happier on the forum they created, and I'm glad for that.

I can see that people might think it's an accusation when people comment on feeling like someone is a troll. And I would even agree that there are ways members could respond that would be less antagonistic. (Perhaps by using "I statements," guys. Not that it would make a difference if someone were a troll, but it might provoke less dissent if someone is unintentionally posting in a way that makes other people think they are trolling.)

lana wrote: I havent felt any judgments coming from her but i do feel SHE is being judged prematurely-- possibly because she has a lighter, breezier, less intellectual style than many here do. So what ? Does everyone have to be the same?


Many of us have commented that we *have* felt judgments coming from DisciplinedHousewife.

Does everyone have to be the same? No, of course not, not even on this board. But people tend to be more welcomed when they take the time to observe the culture of a community, and when they make efforts to fit into that community, or when they seek out a community where they fit better.
User avatar
JigsawAnalogy
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 2875
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:44 am
Location: New York
spam_b: I am not a spammer, I *delete* spammers!
How did you find the board?: Hm. Well, I was poking around in my imagination, and there it was.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby lana » Tue May 01, 2012 8:28 pm

Ok, JA I see where youre coming from. (except that I dont think she meant it to come acrass that way.)
JigsawAnalogy wrote:When I didn't like how I was treated on other discipline forums, and I couldn't find one that met my needs, I started this forum. I know that there are some members of this board that didn't like how they were treated here, and they started *their* own forum. That's a great approach, and while I'm sad to lose the connection with people I considered friends, I assume they are happier on the forum they created, and I'm glad for that.

I just wish that everyone was not so " feather rufflable" in DD groups and among DD people in general. :sigh: Yes if a person doesnt feel welcome they can start a new site or new blog. But i wish there was more tolerance of different styles cos i rather have a few large groups like this one with a lot of active members than a great many little groups and blogs with less correspondence. ok my rant is over :rantswitch:

btw--I like this site because of your policy of not censoring people. I can communicate with others who do or see dd in different ways and find it very interesting. :many:
lana :ewok:
Last edited by lana on Tue May 01, 2012 9:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Tue May 01, 2012 9:20 pm

lana wrote: But i wish there was more tolerance of different styles cos i rather have a few large groups like this one with a lot of active members than a great many little groups and blogs with less correspondence.


Whereas, to me, the great thing about the internet is that there is room for everyone to find something that works really well for that specific person. But then, I'm an introvert, and the notion that I can go somewhere with just a few dozen active members is more appealing than going somewhere with hundreds of active members.
User avatar
JigsawAnalogy
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 2875
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:44 am
Location: New York
spam_b: I am not a spammer, I *delete* spammers!
How did you find the board?: Hm. Well, I was poking around in my imagination, and there it was.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby lana » Wed May 02, 2012 3:06 am

Im an introvert in RL too and i also like a group with about 2 or 3 dozen active members. But I think the newbies are important too. :thinking:
lana :ewok:
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby Sara'sGirl(SG) » Wed May 02, 2012 1:29 pm

Lana,

Thanks for your input. And I mean that sincerely; that's one of the things I value about this board.

DH has said things that have come across TO ME as alternately completely outlandish or rude/judgmental. I don't bear her any ill will. I also am not interested in pretending I believe her if I don't. I'm also not going to keep quiet when she (or anyone) challenges some of the things that I think make this board so great (like by saying she thinks it's wrong of the mods not to step in when someone says something she doesn't like).

I like newbies too. There are many of them that I am glad to see here and have enjoyed reading.

I'm not willing to change my beliefs or avoid saying something that I think is important. Big bruhau? Not so much.

I'm willing to heed (at least somewhat!) J's request for more "I statements." I'm NOT willing to keep my mouth shut when I think BS is going on. DH can grow a thicker skin or not as she chooses, that was simply a suggestion based on what I found annoying in her posts. :chapeau:
Nic

Sing 'til you're breaking glass
or you're breaking down

~Idina Menzel

My blog!
User avatar
Sara'sGirl(SG)
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 1064
Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2007 3:58 pm
spam_b: I don't like spam. It's gross. Meat in a can is wrong.
How did you find the board?: I found my way over from Punishment Board, which is a great site that you should all go see if you haven't already. But I'm too lazy to try to link it here.

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby lana » Wed May 02, 2012 4:17 pm

Thanks SG
Now I see where your coming from. Thinking about it, two things she said are a little hard to believe but im willing to wait and see . I have met a few other women over the yrs in other forums who have hoh's just as or more strict than hers.

Getting spanked in front of company is a fantasy of a lot of people so maybe that part was made up or exagerrated --dont know. Just want to give the benefit of the doubt.
Usually if it is a fantasizer or a troll, they come and go because the effort of a detailed sustained fiction is too much work.

I do apologize to you though, SG--you have the right to confront someone who you dont believe and she prolly should expect to get some raised eyebrows since her reality (if its real) is on the more severe side of ttwd-- which she seems to be well aware of.
lana :ewok:
ps--My concern actually would be not for DHW so much as for a complete newbie who is pretty clearly in an abusive situation where the members dont believe her and drive her away the second day she joins.
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: Should a wife be disciplined on vacation ???

Postby artlover » Wed May 02, 2012 4:59 pm

lana wrote:Thanks SG
Now I see where your coming from. Thinking about it, two things she said are a little hard to believe but im willing to wait and see . I have met a few other women over the yrs in other forums who have hoh's just as or more strict than hers.

Getting spanked in front of company is a fantasy of a lot of people so maybe that part was made up or exagerrated --dont know. Just want to give the benefit of the doubt.


I read a few things on here that I find a bit of a stretch. That one is wayyyyy up there at the top of the list.
artlover
Rank 3
Rank 3
 
Posts: 205
Joined: Sat Aug 06, 2011 3:31 pm
Location: Connecticut
spam_b: I am most certainly not a spammer
How did you find the board?: I was googling around and there you were!

PreviousNext

Return to Punishments

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest