This is a great forum

Whether we call it "domestic discipline" or "rules" or "structure" or just "getting our needs met." This is a spot for those meta discussions about what it is that we do.

This is a great forum

Postby MamaLuna » Tue Jan 11, 2011 12:53 pm

I wanted to thank you all for this forum. I have been looking around in here for a couple of weeks and posted once or twice. This is one of the most balanced sites I have been on. It is such a comfort to find a group that I resonate with and a place where I can talk to people who feel like I do! I have tried and tried over my 40+ years to push down my desire to be punished, spanked and "guided" by my partner. I am so lucky that I have a relationship with a beautiful man that doesn't make fun of me (that is really aweful when that happens), and who is really trying to take my needs into consideration. He is stepping into his role as my HOH (if you will) so incredibly. Red Rump said it best, "I am living the dream."

I wanted to see if any of you have read "How to Get the Spanking You Want" by Vivian ( I have purchased both of her books and given the "How to Give..." one to my DH and wow! is it changing the way he sees this whole DD thing! :blush: If you haven't checked this out, you may want to look at it. I really like how balanced she is in explaining the role a lot of us wish our dominate partners to take (she only writes from the male (top) and female (bottom) experience, sorry) I am not trying to promote her book or anything, I just wanted to share this with you all because I have found it to be so helpful for my DH and ultimately me! :read:

If any of you have read this book I would be interested in your feedback and also how you have felt it works in your relationship.

This morning, for example, I was due for another punishment because of lack of committment to my health and diet (that I have asked DH to help me with), and I tried to weazle out of my punishment. Luckily my DH didn't listen to me and I ended up with a fairly long and embarrassing 45 minutes with his favorite implement, the hairbrush. I have found the more he reads, the more he is able to step up and not get manipulated by me. :sigh:
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How did you find the board?: I have been looking for a support group for my partner and me for this DD lifestyle. We have been in and out of it for a few years now and are venturing back a bit into it to see if we can figure out what works for us and what doesn't.

Re: This is a great forum

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Wed Jan 12, 2011 11:51 am

Thanks for the comments about the forum! I set it up because I had such a hard time finding a forum that seemed open to the whole range of ways people do this thing we do, and I'm happy when other people find it useful.

Those books look interesting. I don't have the money to spare right now, but it might be worth picking up a copy when we do. I'd be interested to see what other people think about it as well.
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Re: This is a great forum

Postby Eayore » Thu Jan 13, 2011 6:43 pm

Yes, I did buy How to Get the Spanking You Want as an e-book. In fact, I don't recall if that is the only way you can get it, or if there is a paper copy available too. I found the advice it gave to be quite similar to the things we have posted here on the subject, and I liked it quite a lot.

As you say, MamaLuna, it is written from the point of view of female bottom looking for male top, I guess because that is what the author has experience of. There was an element of "Man (= caveman) have natural spanking instinct; Woman just have to awaken" ... which was the only weak part for me, but I thought that was easy to forgive.
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