dilemma?

Perhaps your household works without a structure. Go you. The rest of us mortals need to figure out how this thing works. This is a spot for talking about how we create the structure of our various domestic arrangements.

dilemma?

Postby lilly » Wed Aug 10, 2011 3:33 am

dear all, I do not know if it is the proper section for my doubts... I'lle train to explain. I am exploring DD options slowly and carefully, he told me to take my time. He explained me that the first point is trust and submission.
He's giving some trials to me. we decided that if I find that am not committed or strong enough, we will quit.

Short story: he asked me to allow him to give me many hickeys on a special part of my body. he chose my breast, a very symbolic point, maybe the most beautiful part of my body. I got two weeks to give him the consent or to deny it. the term will expire today. so I just have a few hours :help:
A part of me is really concerned to do that, another is favourable. the concerned part is dominated by vanity and afraid of possible pain, the other would be happy and proud to prove to both of us that our relationship and the close connection between us is more important than anything else.

the center of the problem is that I have to decide if I trust him enough to allow him covering my beautiful breasts with lots of hickeys, and If I feel ready to submit to his will, no matter what it is.

what would you suggest me?
ciao
Lily
lilly
eating cake
eating cake
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:28 am
spam_b: hello I am from Italy. there are not many similar resources from my country and in my language.
How did you find the board?: www.google.it

Re: dilemma?

Postby JigsawAnalogy » Wed Aug 10, 2011 10:26 am

I think it's a good idea to be taking things slowly and carefully.

For me and W, trust took a while to build. It isn't that we didn't trust each other at all, but it took time for us to feel confident in what would work for us in ttwd, and we had to take things slowly. We also had a "safe word," where we could stop what was happening while it was in progress if it began to feel unsafe for either one of us. (I suppose we still have a safe word, but mostly we will just tell each other directly if something isn't feeling right, and we have enough trust not to need special language for it.)

Good luck making your decision.
User avatar
JigsawAnalogy
rank 6
rank 6
 
Posts: 2875
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:44 am
Location: New York
spam_b: I am not a spammer, I *delete* spammers!
How did you find the board?: Hm. Well, I was poking around in my imagination, and there it was.

Re: dilemma?

Postby lana » Wed Aug 10, 2011 4:38 pm

Hi Lilly
This is the first time ive ever heard of marking a an SO's breasts with hickeys being used as a punishment (not that theres anything inherently wrong with it--just very unusual IMO).

I have a flat hard limit that i will only be spanked or punished on my bottom or backs of my thighs. Please keep in mind that while your hoh has the authority to choose the punishment, DD is consensual and it must be within the limits that you will submit to. These hard limits may later expand, and imo they often do, but to start out with its important that you get them established, at least verbally.
ex.I used to have caning that was beyond my bounds, but over time ive gotten used to it thru play and now accept it.

lana :welcome8:
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: dilemma?

Postby lilly » Wed Aug 10, 2011 6:31 pm

dear all, thanks for your warm welcome. I am moved because among my friends and acquaintances I've become very unpopular since I go out with the "strnage guy". they turned to be very moralistic so suddendly, or maybe they had ever been, and I had no clues to realize it.

I'd like to share my stories with all those who will have the patience to listen to me, as here I don't feel judged or condamned, and this is a great relif.

the one on my breast was not a real punishment, but a kind of "trust trial". I am not experienced, everything is so new and so exciting, that i am often peasentfully upset. i've never felt such strong emotions all my life long, I can hardly explain. finally I've given my permission, and my shirt and my bra have flight on the floor. than an hard sucking session has started. I was terribly tense, and excited as well. it seemed he would never stop. after just a little bit less that an hour, he has got his result. Now I have 24 hickeys on my breasts, 12 for each one.
I feel so proud of having being able to bear the pressure, the pain, my fears... everything, and to have proven - to myself first -that I am able to submit to his will, strange as it can be, and skeptical I could feel at the beginning.

but it has not been all! He has put me on his knees, and I have also got the first spanking of my life! my heartbeat was so fast! he has told me - gently - that it was not a punishment, as he was incredible satisfied with my beahavior - but a kind of "Initiation". the spanking was not quite hard, but it was long. After, he stopped, and we talked a little bit. than back on his knees, two more times . it seemed to me I could have got not enough. He had never spanked me before, I was still exploring, trapped in my fears and anguishes, but this afternoon everything has come so natural... I feel relaxed, I am enjoyng a kind of endorphine cascade... I feel like a virgin after her first time... and I am, somehow...

and yes, maybe he's not structured, he's really strange, wonderfully bit strange, I think he mixes up all his fantasies, but I am ok with it.
Tonight he has left, he will be back in a week, and time is passing by so sloooowwwww!

thanks for your patient undesrtanding.
lilly
eating cake
eating cake
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:28 am
spam_b: hello I am from Italy. there are not many similar resources from my country and in my language.
How did you find the board?: www.google.it

Re: dilemma?

Postby lana » Thu Aug 11, 2011 3:28 pm

Wow!
Sounds like you had a great first spanking!
Question: Do you tell your friends about your new bf spanking you?? Or is it just his appearance/age/dominant demeanor that they object to?

With my exbf, my mom and sis thought he was a bit too domineering towards me, but thats what i liked about him the best LOL. (This was 8 yrs ago since ive gone with him but we stayed together longer than we ordinarily would have due to DD. Eventually we both realized that we really didnt have that much else in common interest-wise.)

lana :many:
User avatar
lana
Rank 4
Rank 4
 
Posts: 373
Joined: Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:02 pm
spam_b: I am in a dd relationship and wish to communicate w others
How did you find the board?: On a web browser

Re: dilemma?

Postby artlover » Thu Aug 11, 2011 9:18 pm

"but this afternoon everything has come so natural... I feel relaxed, I am enjoyng a kind of endorphine cascade... I feel like a virgin after her first time... and I am, somehow..."

Wow! I thought his desire to effect such a dramatic submission (the multiple breast hickey thing) was more bdsm than ttwd, but whatever. What you are describing there is pretty special.
artlover
Rank 3
Rank 3
 
Posts: 205
Joined: Sat Aug 06, 2011 3:31 pm
Location: Connecticut
spam_b: I am most certainly not a spammer
How did you find the board?: I was googling around and there you were!


Return to Creating Structure

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron