Congratulations on the study year! I hope it goes well for you.
I must admit to mixed feeling on feminist literature. There seems to be 2 kinds. The "you can do what you want" kind and the "all women should be like stereotypical men in the 1950's, with men preferably being secretaries.".
I have no idea if ttwd is right for you, or if you personally are a bottom, Top, or switch.
When you talk about reading things that deal with respect and disobedience, I have thought about this a lot. To me, if you think, or your boyfriend thinks, that all women should be or naturally are submissive, that's a bit off. Or that men are superior/dominant/etc.
However, if your boyfriend wants a woman who is submissive, thats no more wrong than wanting a woman who is dominant. The same goes for you. People can want anything in a partner they like. They can't force a partner to be different, but everyone can define for themselves what their ideal relationship is. I personally feel if they are smart they'll leave some room for compromise in there. But tolerance and freedom are some things the original feminist movement was founded on.
Just to clarify, there are still a lot of feminists out there like that, I don't think they are all the mean ones. Feminism is like Christianity. There are some nutjobs who are way off in left field, and want to put all unbelievers to the sword. But thats not the majority, even if its who the media most likes.
Sorry for ramble, I spend a fair amount of time thinking about this to make sure I'm not being an evil bastard.