Kitchen Implements

[LadyShriver1]

Seriously, do any of you use any "kitchen" implements with any effect? We've broken three wooden spoons, and one spatuala. The other day, after I'd been seriously disrespectful, we had this big deal of piccking out something for him to swat me with. I felt guilty enough that I picked a heavy spatula and handed it over. It handled about two swing before the thing broke, flew up in the air and hit the ceiling fan. This, unfortunately, caused me to giggle. Giggling is bad under those circumstance.

What have you used effectively. Or do I just have cheaper stuff than I think (or maybe a harder bottom?)?

[altbob]

Though I can't say personally, I have heard the Paula Deen line is very good for this.

[JigsawAnalogy]

We've gotten some kitchen implements specifically for spanking, and there was a while when I was looking for a good wooden spoon for cooking and we had a surplus of wooden spoons around the house. They can be *quite* effective, if they're solidly built hardwood spoons, with fairly thick handles. You might also have good luck with some of the silicone utensils--the ones that are metal covered by a thick layer of silicone. We did manage to break the tip off of one of those, but that was only after a few years worth of fairly heavy use. You might also try something like a silicone flat whisk, which wouldn't require quite as much force to be effective.

The problem W and I have had with a lot of kitchen implements is that the sturdy ones can be a little too intense, which sends me towards panic rather than contrition. They can step in after a good warm-up, but used too soon or too quickly they can have the wrong effect. But your mileage will definitely vary with those, and they might work out well for you.

[lana]

My hoh has used a cutting board with a handle and for fun a spautula. They both broke. Here is a really bad evil one that my hoh never thinks of using cause its kept in the kitchen drawer. It is a jar opener that has a handle and a long rubber strap that wraps around jar tops.
Beware: even over jeans, this really stings and it doesnt break.


lana

[Lady Governess]

i have the type of wooden spoon designed for soup pots. It is just like a wooden spoon but longer and thicker to cope with digging right down into the bottom of a soup pot full of bones. It's pure evil and I have never broken it yet.

[Eayore]

We have broken a couple of kitchen implements, but we haven't used anything like that for ages.

[bodack]

Has anyone tried the Bamboo kitchen implements that are becoming popular?

[her_guy]

Many kitchen implements are made from smaller strips of wood glued together. You can see the joints if you look carefully. They usually break at the glued joints.

Look for implements that are made from a single piece of wood, and preferably a stiff hardwood that is not too thick. Also look at the grain for weak spots. One of the stingiest paddles that my Wife uses on me is a thin wood kitchen spatula and it has never broken even after repeated uses. And yes, I am a slow learner. LOL!

Ed

[LadyShriver1]

Thanks guys. But some of you are down right evil. I will not be taking E into Bed, Bath, and Beyond anytime soon!!! I will check the joints on the implements to see if they are solid, too, although I may specifically pick on that isn't if I'm feeling a certain way!

[PrttyinPnk]

Has anyone tried the Bamboo kitchen implements that are becoming popular?

We have a set of bamboo utensils....and they HURT. They are really light, but seem sturdy (they've never broken). I'd say the sensation is steadily increasing burn.....very little thud.

[pinecone]

The idea of being spanked hard enough to BREAK the wooden spoon D has been using on me is absolutely terrifying. i think he barely even uses his arm- more like a very firm flick of the wrist- and it's plenty bad already. ugh. I think that spoon is here to stay.

[JigsawAnalogy]

I think that spoon is here to stay.

Maybe you'll be lucky. Repeated stress could cause it to break without it being used with more force.

[altbob]

Sounds like the old tootsie pop commercials . How many whacks does it take to get to the broken center of a whacky spoon?
One
Twwo hooo
three

[Ice-cream]

He Who Must Be Obeyed thinks that the wooden spoons and spatulas are just for playing around. Eh? Maybe for him.
One particularly nasty kitchen find was a cardboard tube from a catering size roll of cling film. It's considerably thicker and stronger than the typical insert. I had left it on the kitchen counter instead of putting it in the bin, thinking that maybe the kids might get some use out of it. A huge regret! It's nasty, even over jeans and shows no sign of any damage. It's been categoriesed as a serious implement, with dire consequences for me if I dare to throw it away. So now I have this stupid cardboard tube cluttering up my kitchen.
What else do we have? A bread board with a handle - wish it would break. A large pancake spatula but that doesn't do much.
On an aside, when we got married we got a present of a Welsh celtic love spoon. It hangs on the wall like a little reminder of the secret of a happy marriage! Come to think of it, my grandparents also had a wooden spoon ornament in their kitchen and I have my suspicions about them!!!

[Eayore]

Well I know wooden spoons are not to be taken lightly, but I have never come across a cardboard tube that could do that! Sounds interesting.