Keeping the Crazy Ball Rolling

[backlist]

Although I really wish I didn't have crazy to deal with - especially since it makes me feel like crazy might be why I like discipline and spanking, even though I'm certain it isn't - I've got more than my fair share. D. and I have been in together for almost 4 years and at the beginning I was much more sane. Take one traumatic accident (and the resultant stress about heights and loud noises) and sprinkle in a liberal assortment of mania and depression (and the perilous mood swings that come with them) and I'm more than either one of us can handle sometimes.

I'm sure it's why we've had more trouble with rules and why our dynamic has had moments of hanging on by a thread. We keep going, though, because we love this (and each other) and that's enough most of the time.

[JigsawAnalogy]

Yeah, "crazy" sometimes does make everything just that much harder. It is, however, my firm opinion, that even without "crazy" there's always something that's going to cause roadblocks in a relationship.

As for getting crazier over the course of a relationship... hoo boy, yes. In my case, it seems like once my brain started accepting that W is safe, then it started pushing things out of my subconscious and into daily life, where things are way messier now than they were.

Kinda sucks for W that her ability to make me feel safe means that I can be a total obnoxious butthead sometimes.

[Rose]

[W-Jigsaw'sBoss]