It Hurts

[Homeatlast]

I have posted this as a new topic but really is is just a continual moan from the God knows how many previous posts of mine.

It hurts when I wake up and think that I just CAN'T go on today.
It hurts when my daughter needs me and I want to run away from her.
It hurts when the hand of friendship looks too scary to trust
It hurts when my partner is sick and I am too weak to cope
It hurts when I want to live but a large part of me doesn't
It hurts when my mum is sick and I cannot reach out
It hurts when I need help and I can't ask
It hurts when I do reach out and it feels like I am rejected or misunderstood
It hurts that no matter what I can't like myself even though others think I should
It hurts that I need ttwd and I really think I should just say 'Let's stop this'
It hurts when I think everyone wouldbe just better off if I disappeared
It hurts when I think I should now apologise for wasting your time with this shit
It hurts when all of these hurts are here at once - like today.



Yeah, well that's it really.

[JigsawAnalogy]

it does hurt. does it help to know that the point of hurt is to motivate you to do what it takes to end the hurt? and, obviously, i don't mean dying.

the hurt is there to motivate you to find ways to heal. it's why your bones hurt when they get broken, or your body aches when you get the flu. and it's totally why your heart feels pain when you've been hurt emotionally.

i will also add that there can be a point when the hurt is less. it doesn't mean you won't get angry or frustrated, but there's a point when you won't hurt as much as you do now, and there will be times when the pain is entirely gone.

obviously, i don't think you need to apologize, but i can understand the pain that would lead you to think that you do. i would say instead that you were really brave to share so openly, and i greatly appreciate that you took the time to do so.