i'm sorry about things being so hard. it totally sucks.
with ptsd stuff: people are gonna be idiots. i'd like to think differently, but people will either not have experienced trauma, so they don't always understand it, or they *did* experience trauma, are in denial about it, and so deny other people's experiences.
i can't remember, are you in therapy? with a good therapist, you can work on ways of coping with triggers and all of that, to help reduce the severity. once november is over, part of what i'm going to be juggling my time to do is adding more stuff to my . there's stuff there already, but not much. i'm going to be changing the stated focus to be more about anyone who survived abuse, although i'll have plenty on there about multiplicity, because i had such a hard time finding things that helped me to cope with that specifically. but really, the coping-with-abuse stuff, and probably even the stuff i wrote about DID/MPD could be useful to anyone. because even if not everyone is multiple, i think that some of the approaches can be useful.
anyhow. sorry to shill my other site on your thread, except that i'd recommend you checking it out if you're having a hard time (browse through the links to the workbook, which i'm going to start inviting more people to collaborate on, and widen the focus there to anyone who is a trauma survivor, since i think we've all got a lot of tools we can share.)
and yeah, it sucks to lose a relationship. sometimes for me, though, it gives me the space to focus on healing myself, which can then lead to being able to find yourself in a much better, stronger, and healthier relationship.