Yeah, I'm not stupid! Each thing I did was pretty much different, yes, if I did the same thing again, I am sure his anger would be instantly created. I don't think he would give my behind any sympathy at all. Not that he is going to give it sympathy.
His opinions about boards like this are that there are people that just want to be spanked and people that want to spank. He and I are definitely not into BDSM, we have no disrespect for those that are, but his feelings are that spankings help pull me away from doing irrational things.
The first spanking came after a vacation. I got mad, refused to talk to him the entire time we were packing to come home, refused to talk to him on the way home, until I had to pee, and trust me I had to pee for a very very long time. I asked him to just pull on the side of road so I could pee because I didn't want to impeded his progress of getting home rapidly (smartass). He said that was not possible, I said guys do it all the time. He said I wasn't a guy. When we got back to his house, I unpacked the camping supplies, and went home. A day later, I received an angry email stating that he had enough, and I needed to learn my lesson. He stated that he wanted to spank me so hard that I could not sit down for a week. My response was "year right" that wasn't going to happen. Several days later, I called, with my tail tucked under and said I was ready to come over. I arrived, all the drapes were shut, the belt, ping pong paddle were sitting on the couch. I said hello, grabbed a beer and sat down. He asked, why are you here? I thought about leaving, but thought better about it and responded with to take my punishment. Needless to say, if he ever suspects that I am refusing to talk due to anger, the paddle comes out, and I start talking.
Some of the five incidents occured before this one. They have impeded our relationship because he has a fear of women leaving him. They were running away from him incidents. You know the flight not fight behavior, but I'm in areas where its not safe, its miles away from phones, or services. One time was at the Colorado river, I jumped out of the boat, swam to shore and hiked to the mobile home we were staying at. I mentioned the other one was a 13 mile walk in the middle of the night. The most recent incident he made me so upset that I went to a place that I am ashamed of and don't want to talk about. The lexan paddle was ordered because of this incident. I hope he spanks me hard enought that I never even think about going to that place again. I've done it before, he knows, but its been a really long time. Its not drugs or drinking, its only something God can help me with, its a mental illness.
Trust me, I have been on extremely good behavior since the paddle arrived. I didn't believe him until he showed it to me. I do want to know what it feels like. I want to know if it will scare me enough. I want to be more afraid of the consequence than my actions when I am irrational. Everyone gets irrational, but if someone can help you from not being stupid and irrational, I think that means they love you and care about you. I never really was spanked growing up, I was abused, its different...really different.
Anyway, I had a good laugh when you suggested repeating the action...yeah that won't be happening. I would have to get to a real irrational state to do that.